Real Tech Mom

Breaking up with a significant other is hard, breaking up with your boss when you quit can kind of feel the same.

You know when you try to break up with someone you don’t want to hurt them, lead them on or make them feel bad. At least not in healthy relationships. Recently I left my job at a company I helped start. In every sense of the word, it was a break up. I was breaking up with my boss.  But what I will do is state simply I left for a new opportunity that enables me to grow professionally. How does that sound for impersonal professional?

When I was preparing my “we need to talk” speech in my head, it reminded me much like breaking up with an old boyfriend. Some points I will mention:

• I wanted to go somewhere public in case he had a melt down, that way if he yelled and freaked out, I’d be surrounded by strangers people.
• I didn’t tell him where I was going to, much like you never tell the ex, there is a new little somethin’ somethin’ or if you do, you don’t say who.
• I wanted to not make it an angry goodbye , or point out faults as to why I was leaving but said rather, it’s not you it’s me (remember personal growth right?)
• And lastly, I packed up all of my things before I broke the news, in case I was subject to verbal abuse. Much like you get all of your stuff before you break the news to your soon to be ex-partner.

I am happy to report that it went better then expected. Kind of like, “No. No. Really? I’ll give you more money.” But at this point and most of my career at this company it wasn’t about the money.  I have to say, I loved what I did as a recruiter.  I loved helping people find jobs that they wouldn’t have had the chance to find other wise. But nothing can last forever. It was time for me to move on and make a change.

Some points to remember when leaving your job; especially if it’s a small company. When you give notice, it’s not the time to point out faults in the owner and the business, that is what an exit interview is for (if you get one.) Remember the things you’ve learned from the company, and from the job. Remember the person who hired you and who gave you an opportunity to grow with the company. And lastly remember that you should NEVER ever burn any bridges. Even if you never want to cross them again.

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I got this from a friend of mine via email, thanks Daniela!

An Obituary printed in the London Times – Interesting and sadly rather true.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn’t always fair;
- and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I’m A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone

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Let me keep you up to date as to why i’m writing this.

Almost one year ago I wrote a post questioning what on earth Emo’s and Cutter’s were and I’ve been enlightened, OVER and OVER again.  For some reason my mommy blog has been bombarded by people (each in their own way) telling me the difference between the two. I get it.

Now I understand teenage years are full of angst but suicidebaby69 and hardcoreemo stop trying to comment on how your definition is right.  I’ve approved most of the comments and deleted the plain dumb ones. Your voice has been heard.

I’m not deminishing the pain and angst young people today feel, nor am i condoning cutting yourself. If you feel compelled to cut yourself to feel better, GET HELP.  There is always a better way to deal with your pain.

In saying that, I will NO longer be accepting comments on the previous blog post. Create a blog dedicated to cutting or emo lifestyle if you want your voice heard.

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Well my friends if you’ve missed part one, you might want to check it out. Even if you are not looking for a job you probably know someone who is. So please help them out!

Your email address is dumb

It may have been ok while you were in high school but having an email address like (and these are just made up but I’m sure they exist): hotsexychick, dome69, youknowyouwantit, lovingbaby,babygurl, sexystud6969696969.. is immature and makes you look unprofessional!

I can’t tell you how often you can tell the age of someone who is applying or even more shockingly how often your resume will be BLOCKED and sent to junk and/or spam mail.  Firewalls are hypersensitve these days and will block anything that looks sexual. And come on hotsexychick, do you think the HR person really wants to interview you for a professional position when that is your email address, answer: no.

You have type and handwriting on your resume

Do one or the other, but do not do both!  And really unless you’ve got amazing penmanship and the advertisement is asking you to hand write something, type it up. But really most people want resumes emailed so they can reference them later.

Your cover letter is wrong

There are many things you can do wrong with your cover letter:

1) The name of the company is wrong

2) The name of the hiring manager is wrong

3) You make spelling mistakes

4) You don’t highlight your qualifications if they ask you to

If an ad tells you to specifically explain why you meet the qualifications on your cover letter, then DO IT! If they tell you to put your salary expectations on there DO IT!

You were gender specific

You assume the hiring manager is a man.  I cannot tell you how many resumes I get addressed as Sir all the time in emails, resumes and cover letters. I even get people calling me Eric, when my email address is ErinC.  No better way then to make someone despise you!

Too many big words, not enough results

You can say all you want that you are detail oriented, that you are the number one performer in customer service/sales.  I want to know WHY  you are detail oriented, how can you back that up. I also want to know what made you the number one performer in customer service/sales.  Details really makes me pay attention to you more.

You’re condescending

When you phone into the company do not assume that you are only speaking to the receptionist. AND for that matter if you are rude to the receptionist you need to get an attitude check. She can choose to forward you off to the right or wrong person. She works very hard at the face of the company.  She also talks to many of the hiring managers, and most often they love her.. be nice!  Oh and as a side note the receptionist may be a man, so there is no discrimination from me.

But above all, be sensitive to the situation, proof your resume and cover letter and do not ASSUME… because, and yes I’ll say it you’ll make an ass out of YOU, not me.

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In today’s market you don’t just have to be qualified you have to be better than the other applicants.

The person reviewing your resume may like things that are different from what I’m posting here, so while these are my suggestions they are not set in stone.

These are the first 5 things as to why you’re not getting an interview for the job you want.

1) You only have 1 resume

When you are in any type of profession in this market you are most likely applying for different industries that cater to the same type of job you have.  That being said, if you are in IT you know that a help desk operator and a software architect are two totally different things. Just think about this, a help desk operator for a HVAC company and a help desk operator for a crown corporation may have the same duties but what’s expected from these employees is radically different.

Small companies depend on the worker bee type of employee who will wear many hats. Large corporations generally have people who all wear different hats and if it’s not in their job description they generally don’t do it.

So why is this important?

Because you NEED to tailor your resume for the industry and size of company you are applying too. Someone who thrives on creativity and being able to make a difference in the company may not like corporate America. Someone who likes process and structure might not like the small business feel. Small businesses look for different traits then large corporations.

Ask yourself where do you fit in and then ask yourself does your resume reflect that? If not, tailor different resumes to suit what you’re applying to.

Lesson: create different resumes to suit what you’re applying for.

2) You don’t have enough information

Is your resume one page? Then it’s too short in my opinion. I look at hundreds of resumes a day. AND while some people say it should fit on one page, after working for 15-20 years it had better not fit on one page.  I’m a big fan of resumes that have summaries at the top to showcase your skills I’m asking for in the advertisement but that does not mean I don’t want to know what you did at each company you worked for.

Saying that you were a receptionist at ABC company doesn’t tell me if you did A/P, scheduling or answering the phone. Tell me why you suit what I’m looking for and I’m more inclined to phone you in for an interview.

Lesson: Don’t be afraid to showcase why you’re the person for the job, be specific!

3) You haven’t proofed your resume

Ok this should be number one. Spell checking your resume is not enough. You can still spell something correctly but use it in the wrong way. i.e. Two and too, their, there and they’re hold different meanings learn the difference between them.

Get someone else to look over your resume. Make sure you’re using the right tense consistently talk about your accomplishments in the past tense. If you do use present tense, don’t go back and forth in the same job description.

Lesson: Don’t be a lazy dumbass, proof your resume!

4) Your picture is on your resume

Even Bill Gates should not put his picture on his resume.

I always thought this was self explanatory but apparently not. In North America if you aren’t applying for a modelling/stripping or pornography job DO NOT put your picture on your resume. I had an argument with friends of mine 5 years ago saying that you should put your picture on your resume and to be honest, I know that people honestly just laugh at the pictures that accompany resumes.

Lesson: If you want people to know what you look like drop it off in person but DO NOT put your picture on your resume.

5) Two words: Social Networks

I’m sure you all got an email last week about the girl who posted something negative about her job and her boss on facebook only to be fired on facebook as he was one of her friends. While it seems silly and that it may be your personal life, newsflash it’s ONLINE!!!!

More and more hiring managers will go to facebook to check someone out before they call them in for an interview. what is your profile picture, what does it say about you as an employee? What type of information do you have available to the public, is it something you want employers to see?

I currently use Xobni for email management and guess what it pulls pictures from Linkedin and Facebook from all the applicants who apply for our jobs. So if your best profile picture is you getting drunk and looking like an idiot on your profile page, guess what, your potential employers will pass on you.

Lesson: Put a normal profile picture up.

And twitter. Oh twitter. I love twitter. But you tweeting at work about how dull your day is, and how much you hate your job it is grounds for dismissal. Not only does it reflect badly on you.. but future employers will wonder, why on earth they would hire you if all you do is bash your employer.

Lesson: be careful what you tweet.

Stay tuned for part two. In the meantime, always update your resume and be smart online. You never know who’s looking you up.

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For those of you who know who he is you’ll know his name, for those who think he sounds familiar, that’s because he should, he wrote The happiest baby on the block.

He was in Winnipeg for a conference and had a community night at the local art gallery where he spoke about his two books and DVD’s. He mentioned that for the baby part of his techniques, the video is better as it shows you exactly how to do the techniques. I’d watched the video’s and my husband and I were both very big on his methods, despite the crazy looks we got from people. By the way, he demonstrated these methods on babies in the speaking session. and they worked, so it’s not just me promoting this.

On thing the baby whisperer emphasises is that baby should NOT fall asleep at the breast. God, I was obsessed with following these baby pro’s advice. It drove me to madness. But if you use what works for you, it’s good advice, you just have to find what works for you and not feel bad about not doing everything the book tells you.

I’m convinced that kids don’t come with manuals because they’re not machines. There is no right answer. The easier you accept that the better.

One thing my husband and I didn’t do, that he suggested you start at any age is play white noise all night long. My son is a pretty good sleeper (though he has his moments) and he was not always that way. I exhausted myself trying to get him to learn to fall asleep by himself by putting him awake in his crib. It all comes down to, “easy now, hard later.” 

I’m excited about watching the happiest toddler on the block, although people are more inclined to do the steps for the happiest baby, people are more reluctant to do the toddler one because it compares children to Neanderthal’s . many people like to think of kids as little adults.

VS.

He maintains that that we are their ambassador’s trying to teach them our cultures values and manners. Trying to civilize them. I’ll write back once i’ve watched the video’s but if you have a child who has tantrums you’re going to want to watch this!

But on a side note, he was such a wonderful speaker. Very easy to listen to and funny. As a parent, I didn’t feel judged but heard. I got to meet him and was able to thank him for saving my sanity when my son was young. He took concern when I told him i wanted to jump off a bridge, and i quickly explained to him that it wasn’t PPD but a figure of speech. I promote his method’s to new parents and old ones, they truly work. He mentioned that in ten years many babies will sleep with white noise in their room, which will accompany the back to sleep program (kids sleeping on their back). If any parents have any questions about the baby methods please email me!

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I received this from a friend of mine, it’s totally cute!  It’s a video about how I’m the best mother of the year, even Obama congratulates me!

You can customize it for your wife, sister, mom, daughter! So go on, make someone laugh and make them Mother of the year for 2009!

Click here to make your own!

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